Author Topic: Reasons why a flashlight is better than a woman  (Read 4008 times)

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Offline jacktheclipper

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Reasons why a flashlight is better than a woman
« on: January 05, 2016, 07:26:26 PM »
 The hot ones are usually bright

 One touch turns them on

....

help me out here ...

« Last Edit: January 23, 2016, 06:46:22 AM by JohnnyMac »

Offline JohnnyMac

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Re: Reasons why a flashlight is better than a woman
« Reply #1 on: January 23, 2016, 06:44:52 AM »
...Flashlights don't complain when you fondle them.  In fact, they love it!

...When a flashlight stops doing what you want you can toss it and get a new one.

...Flashlight getting boring showing its age?  Mod it and make it new and exciting!  Your woman is getting boring and showing her age?  Yeah...good luck with that.

...My flashlights don't get jealous if I lust over a new one.

...You can own more than one flashlight and they all get along and don't care!

I could go on but I'll let some others contribute  :D

Offline bugsy36

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Re: Reasons why a flashlight is better than a woman
« Reply #2 on: February 09, 2016, 12:58:04 PM »
Yeah..well...

Most flashlights are warmer than some of the women I have known ;)

Offline Spasmod

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Re: Reasons why a flashlight is better than a woman
« Reply #3 on: February 09, 2016, 04:28:39 PM »
If you drop your flashlight in a puddle of water it doesn't complain, but if you throw your wife in a swimming pool, you never live it down.

Offline ToyKeeper

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Re: Reasons why a flashlight is better than a woman
« Reply #4 on: February 10, 2016, 12:40:49 AM »
 :(

Do I need to list the reasons why a flashlight is better than a man?

I could start with "doesn't make jokes about why inanimate objects are better than women".

Offline jacktheclipper

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Re: Reasons why a flashlight is better than a woman
« Reply #5 on: February 10, 2016, 01:00:00 AM »
I thought I posted this in the locker room ...

Offline JohnnyMac

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Re: Reasons why a flashlight is better than a woman
« Reply #6 on: February 10, 2016, 03:09:16 PM »
Maybe we need to create a ladies locker room.  :D

Offline darrenrichardson

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Re: Reasons why a flashlight is better than a woman
« Reply #7 on: March 20, 2017, 04:18:42 PM »
lol, love these!
Love life, love LEDs!

Offline bykfixer

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Re: Reasons why a flashlight is better than a woman
« Reply #8 on: April 16, 2017, 01:56:48 PM »
When my flashlight can cook fried chicken as good as my wife I'll join this one.
John 3:16

Offline macka17

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Re: Reasons why a flashlight is better than a woman
« Reply #9 on: April 16, 2017, 02:57:52 PM »
The next job Flashlight that can give me a head.

  I'll have 2 thank you.  8) 8) 8) :P

Offline baboon

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Re: Reasons why a flashlight is better than a woman
« Reply #10 on: October 24, 2017, 10:29:24 AM »
Cool topic so I should post it here  ;D

most important thing, Flashlight can't talk all the day like woman  ;D ;D ;D

Offline NorthernHarrier

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Re: Reasons why a flashlight is better than a woman
« Reply #11 on: October 25, 2017, 12:44:56 PM »
I joined this forum in the hope it would be more welcoming to all people than a certain other popular flashlight forum, and that the moderator(s) would help keep it free of the biases that seem to be encouraged on that other forum.  I'm disappointed to see this thread.   :-\
I went to the store to buy batteries - but they weren't included, so I had to buy them again.  -- Steven Wright

Offline rookiedaddy

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Re: Reasons why a flashlight is better than a woman
« Reply #12 on: October 27, 2017, 02:43:59 AM »
funny thread...


I however, can tell you why a woman is better than a flashlight, or knife, or car or... to quote @ToyKeeper's "inanimate objects"...
... I can't shake that eerie feeling when I'm alone with a flashlight, or flashlights, even-though I'm afraid of the dark
... when I'm with my wife, I feel that together we can shoulder the weight of the world
... I love a good argument with a woman, flashlight only flashes/SOS...
... woman is the best depression medication, trust me, I know... flashlight depresses me when the Turbo is only 60 seconds...
... woman keeps a man's sanity in check, flashlight overdrive a man's insanity...
... last but not least, woman don't "care" about my secret stash, but flashlight will drain every last bit of it...